I don't know...

It's ten days now since he died.

image found on Google search.

Ten days of things to do and things to take care of, and all the life goes on stuff.
Still much to do, a lot to figure out, and everything is hinging (hingeing?)on everything  else. Tried to call Social Security, but no one on the phone would talk to me. Couldn't give me any information related to Rex because of not having his permission. Never mind that he has deceased, died, is unavailable. They can't talk to me without his current consent.

Good luck with that.

Will have to go to office, which has to wait until I have the death certificate. I'm going to have to go in person, so I can go to Batavia. If  try to make an appointment from home, they will send me to the Portsmouth office. I barely know where Portsmouth is (on SR 125 East). I sure don't know where to find anywhere in Portsmouth.
I do know where Batavia is and the places in Batavia.
If we still lived in Mt Orab, or even Decatur, we would automatically go to Batavia. Seems the Social Security Administration does NOT consider Adams County as part of the Greater Cincinnati area, while Brown County is. This has made it interesting before. I just truck myself and my paperwork to Batavia at my convenience. If I get in early enough, I don't have to wait too long.

But first, I got notice from Adams County Jobs & Family Services. I am to report Monday to their jobs program (which has no jobs, but they are required by law to do the sign-ups, etc.) Didn't take them long to remove me from being a care-giver, although they have yet to acknowledge the prospective change in income.

Also got a medical card for Rex in the mail. We've never had one of those for him before. I kind of thought a little late, but as I have yet to be billed for anything, it's probably not too late. I think it's one of the changes for the disabled that has come with the Affordable Care Act.
At least I will have something to send when the bills come.
The brief letter with the card (sheet of paper) said nothing about the spendown, so I wonder if that's still in play or not.

I guess I'll find that out, too.

I do wonder what I will do when all this busyness is done. When there is nothing more to hurry up and wait for.

Something else to be found out.

worth working ?

Today the local news is filled with a long wrap-around line of people hoping to work at the new Jungle Jim's that is opening in September. People are so hungry for jobs that they are waiting in summer heat -- and this summer's heat is especially brutal-- for hours. Jungle Jim's is looking for 300 to 400 people, from inexperienced to specialist. They've probably had about 3000 people turn out. That is my estimate from looking at photos and news coverage.

I've been looking for work, too, but that's a more troublesome proposition. If I start work, even just five or ten hours a week, my husband's spenddown for MedicAid will go up, by whatever amount of money I make. Probably the gross amount, not net, but I'm unsure about that. We'll also lose out food assistance, but that's not a deal breaker for just the two of us. But what if we still had children to nourish so they'll grow, and pay attention in school.

And I won't be at home to care for him. He doesn't need nursing or tending, but he can't stand at a stove -- or even a microwave -- long enough to cook for himself. So would he have to go without any time that I work at or through meal time? What if something were to go wrong? What if the electric goes out and he can't use his nebulizer or his oxygen? How will anyone know to help him? How would they help him? What if a water line breaks? He doesn't have the strength or the agility to shut off the water under the sink behind the jars and brushes.

But I still look for work -- I'm pretty sure it's better than not working. Better for us both in terms of community and personal sanity. I know this isolated life makes me edgy, cross, crabby, and mean-as-hell. So, if there's a local job I hear about, I try for it. In a year and a half, I've had two interviews. For the others (about a dozen) I don't make the cut. I'm not sure if it's the beauty check I fail or the background check. Not that it matters.

But I wonder, as I fill in yet another application, if I should get beyond the interview stage, will the job eventually won be worth it. Or will it cost me more -- in more ways -- than staying at home does?

I don't know, but I would like to have the chance to find out.