Time in Between

This last week of the year always seems to be a bit of time "in between." No matter where you work, it's not a full work week. If you're in a factory, it's not usually a big production week -- that shortened time. If you work retail or customer service, it's mostly a nightmare of sorts.

Time. Thanksgiving is the time for the past, everything we've enjoyed or lost. Christmas is for the present. Giving and receiving. New Year is, of course, for the future. The changes we'll make or the things we hope to have stay the same.

So, it's a good thing to have this last, odd little week to think of Time, as we linger between/among past, present, and future.The past is gone by, the present is here, but only for now, and the future is yet to come.

I wish you joy

Let There Be Light

Enjoy your loved ones this season
They will not always be with you

Enjoy your home, your meal, your travels
They will not last forever.

Love and be loved, and enjoy the loving
It's the only thing that lasts

May your tears be joy
Or turned to joy
In every coming year

Christmas Lights

One of the things I love about this time of year are the lights. I think everyone, at some time of life, makes a drive to enjoy looking. And what better way to dispel the darkest days of winter than by looking at lights?

It seems that all the attention that is given to lavish light displays. Lavish, large, confusing, and overwhelming are a few of the words that come to mind to describe these front-yard circuses.  These displays are more often about outdoing someone else, or showing off "look what I can do" or some other unseasonal attitude.

There are displays where the owners are truly trying to embrace and showcase as many aspects of the season(s) as possible. Snowmen and candy canes and gingerbread are as much a part of winter as Santa Claus and reindeer, or manger scenes with Magi advancing more day by day. There is nothing wrong with celebrating all these things at the same time, during a time of extravagance.

But these are the only displays that garner public attention (i.e., the news media.)

Many a Colonial or Victorian home  is given a touch of elegance from clear lights trimming the roof edges. There doesn't need to be anything else to share the spirit, to catch the eyes -- or to warm the heart.
One of the most breathtaking decorated homes was in Mt. Orab. The windows outlined in red, the bushes in green, with clear lights hanging from the eaves.
Simple and elegant.

Who needs anything more?

More toilet paper thoughts

When you give, for your holidays,
when you put food in the barrell, or drop off a toy or pull a name off a giving tree

remember hygiene products as part of your giving. Many church food banks give out only food, and government help consists of food stamps which can be used for nothing else. And that's fine, and wonderful -- thank god there are people and places that provide food. There can be no more basic help than that.

But if you've been living paycheck-to-paycheck, and the paycheck stops, or if you are waiting for unemployment payments to begin or be renewed, or if you are just struggling to get yourself back on your feet, there are non-food needs.

I begin with toilet paper, especially for families, but there is so much more. Soap; bar, dish, laundry, shampoo. Personal cleanliness is not optional when you're looking for work. A faintly odorous person in stained clothing is rarely a priority as a new hire. What about wax paper or aluminum foil so that leftovers or opened food can be wrapped and saved and used at a later date? Diapers for families with little ones -- a pack of diapers would be a luxury for many a mother thrown into need or just struggling to juggle one more need. And feminine hygiene products. How embarrassing to have to make-do in that part of life, or, worse, to have to ask someone behind a desk for such a thing.

If your food barrel asks for "non-perishables' you can donate any or all of these products. The store clerks might think it a little odd to find in a food barrel, but the distributing agencies know that this speaks to an unheard, unadvertised need. This is a big reason they take cash donations -- to buy the non-food products.

So, if you'd like to do something a little different this season, or donate  a different sort of charity, throw in a bar of soap or a roll of toilet paper. The person who doesn't have to ask a stranger for such will thank you.

Ads that Subtract

It's no wonder the rest of the world sees Americans as frivolous or having no concept of the "bigger picture. If they see our world through our advertisements, we're pretty stupid and extremely small minded. The latest TV ad battle seems to be toilet paper wars.
I think we all agree that toilet paper has one basic function. To "you know," as one coy commercial puts it. That commercial goes further. It wants tp to "you know" without "you know."
Aren't you going to wash your hands anyway?

Then there are the bears. (Who have houses, by the way, and don't necessarily have to "you know" in the woods.) These bears become alarmed at tp sticking to the bottom. Surely that is because they run around bare-bottomed? If there's ever any danger of someone observing toilet paper stuck to me, I'll shower first and then try to avoid having to "you know." Heaven forbid tp lint on my bottom!

These bears are so enamoured of their lint free super strong extra soft toilet paper that they spend minutes of my time singing love songs to it.

Strong paper should be for making strong statements -- in writing, in printing, in fiction and in fact. Not for a single-use purpose and then flushed away.

What a waste!

Snow Days

The big topic this week has been snow days. Between school closing this summer and school opening this fall, the departing governor deprived the schools in Ohio of two of their snow (or calamity) days. We had five, he left us with three. Most of the rural or smaller schools have now used two of these three days, and it isn't Christmas yet.

The new governor has promised to give us back our two taken-away snow days. And many schools build a few extra days into their schedules, because apparently they know something the government does not: Nature won't be legislated.

Whose idea was this? Who decided that a child's ability to learn was dependent on how many hours they spend in a classroom? Are our children deprived of their right to education if they spend five hours a day in the classroom instead of eight? Where is there data to back that up?

Schools used to be scheduled around the natural cycles of (agricultural) life. Now, parental life has to be scheduled around school. And God forbid the school not be there when the parent(s) have things to do. If that happens, in this society, it is the parents who end up punished for tardiness or absenteeism.

That shows that it's not so much the hours needed in the classroom for learning. It seems to be much more about the hours in the classroom for babysitting.

I propose a whole new concept. Let's set school schedules, without counting days or hours in seats. Let's say these are the days of school. And when something happens, we smile as we regret the lost opportunity, and when the calamity is over with, we just get on with life.

Not rearrange it.

Wrong again! Hooray!

The winter storm descended to just winter weather. The drop in temperature didn't happen until after the snow, and the winds weren't quite as bad as expected. So, we did NOT have rain wrapped power lines freeze solid and then be whipped by winds. I haven't been so happy to be wrong in a long time.

They still have so much trouble predicting the snow/sleet things. Overall they did a pretty good job this time. I'm just very glad that no one lost power.

It wasn't very many years ago we had what I call "the Crystal Christmas". A rain turned cold unexpectedly, and power lines and tree branches froze. It was beautiful, but dangerous. Power lines snapped, crackled, popped.
A friend had the power box torn off her house. I couldn't get to work because there were trees broken and toppled into each of the three roads I could drive.
My nephew's newborn premie, finally home, in a house with no power.

Branches preserved in ice like flies in amber. Perfectly clear crystals that scattered rainbow light when the sun hit them. Beautiful, beautiful danger.

So, I try to keep everyone prepared and aware. I hope I never become a panic-monger. I have good reason for my concerns, I hope.

But I am happy for everyone here that my caution was unnecessary. I hope it helped those who are further out.

In the meantime, I hope everyone is staying warm.

snow 'storm' -- yeah, right

We are in the midst of our first winter storm. From the forecasts, it's got the potential to be nasty. A day of heavy rain, changing over to snow, then plummeting temperatures, rising winds, and more snow. Up to 7 inches in places is what they are saying now.

I know this isn't a lot for many places. People in this area like to feel superior because Atlanta and Charleston close down for an inch or two. You'd think they would figure that that Chicagoans and Canadians sneer at them in the same manner -- and justifiably so.

No matter where you are, this sounds like a bad sequence of events. I'm going to be ready for ice on the power lines and the wind whipping them around. I took it upon myself to warn facebook friends and family who are local to get alternate heat. Even if they don't need it this time, at least they'll have it.

Makes me wonder, though. How do places like Buffalo and Chicago and points north not have problems with power outages?
clearing roads and keeping businesses open -- a lot of that is just better systems and better products. Spraying roads with an antifreeze solution for one thing. That's not cost effective here., although it is occasionally tried and used.

Is it possible that  these snow cities have a more laid back attitude? Here, the counties and townships have to post snow emergencies and tell people they aren't allowed to drive, and then peopled do anyway, because they'll get fired if they don't come to work. Do the snow cities have a greater tolerance for snow days for adults? Or are adults just more prepared for the weather because it is the norm?

How do they avoid the sometimes days-long power outages that we have here? Or do they as a rule 'just' prepare for that, too?  Do most homes have an alternate heat  source? Or a non-electric dependent furnace?

I'd like to know, so I can be more prepared myself. So I can help others be more prepared.

As it is, if you have problems, but can get out, my door is always open to anyone in need. We will have food and heat, if we need back ups, and you are all welcome here.

(written Saturday December 11)

Bicycles Built for Two year olds?

They're cute. They're adorable. Tiny little bicycles scaled down for tiny little humans.

Of course they are. Miniatures are cute, adorable, and worth cooing over. Miniature Victorian houses, miniature rosewood tables, miniature couches chairs, dining room sets, and flowers in the vases. The more precisely they are scaled down to normal proportions, the more ahh-worthy they are.

But two-year-olds on bicycles? Most two-year-olds barely have the co-ordination to ride a tricycle on an enclosed pathway. They are still fine tuning their gross motor skills, and they haven't yet learned to do several things at a time. Like keep their balance, move their feet, watch where they are going, and listen to a parent.

Why the rush to get  children onto adult equipment? By the age of 2 , haven't the parents learned yet that the baby years fly by too fast, too soon? So why the hurry to rush adult abilities on them?
Let them be kids.
Let them run before they race away -- that day will come too soon. Let them climb steps, teeter at the top of the slide, push off the swing with their own feet before we give them wheels to outrun us. God knows, most of them can do that without help.

Parents and grandparents, as you do your shopping, please think of the child you are shopping for. Is it a good idea to let them go faster than you can? Is it a great thing for your child to skip developmental steps?

Yes, the little bicycles are cute. Nearly irresistible.Anything miniature is cute.

Except roadkill.

Snow Flakes

We've had out first 'significant' snow of the season. It's a bit early  for Southwestern Ohio, but it's not unheard of. It fell on a Saturday, which was nice. Not a great many traffic problems; nothing cancelled. It was just a snow. Probably the first of many.

Some of the snow was the fine grainy sort. Some was more sleet than snow. And some were the big fat lazy flakes that drift around and land gracefully, piling up until they've whited out the world.

These snowflakes are lovely to look at, and the inspiration and reminder of the shibboleth about no two being alike.

It's true, of course. Some snowflakes are complex crystals, with many points and angles and loops. Others are seeming webbed asterisks, as breathtaking in their simplicity as the others are in their complexity

These differences are observed with awe, pointed out with pride, and honored. Every snowflake is as different and unique as its rise and fall through the clouds, the highs and lows of its individual existence.

Why can't we honor and respect our human differences in the same way? Why must we label and drug our children when they don't fit the cookie cutter mold? Why are our  creative-minded adults also labeled and drugged into compliance or blind obedience? Are we not each unique in the same way that snowflakes are? Are we not created from the same basic material, then shaped by the highs and lows of our existences?

Why, then, is it an awe inspiring wonder for a snowflake to be individual, but human individuals are flakes?

Christmas Cards

I got my first two cards the other day. They were from my sister Jean and my nephew Josh's family.

My sisters and I usually have a sort of friendly rivalry over getting those cards out every year. We all want to be first, we all  want to be heard and seen for the season before the busyness gets in the way. We all usually have our cards ready to mail out by or on Black Friday. We just don't always have stamp money on that date, depending on jobs and paydates and how badly the car broke down since the last payday and what it needs.

This year was different. Rita was in Florida and I am out of work and out of money. So Jeanie is the winner this year.
Congratulations to her.

This all made me think of how the holiday traditions keep changing.

When we were young, my dad's employer had a Christmas party every year. Rented out Taft Theater in Cincinnati, had cartoons and clowns and magic shows, balloons, cheddar cheese popcorn, and of course, Santa Claus and presents. This party was held on the third Saturday in December, so that that was when we had to get our tree by. We needed somewhere to put the presents once we got them home.

Then, the company changed hands, and the parties were no more. By that time the family had got so big, and we older kids were wise enough, that by the time Thanksgiving came around, we were running out of hiding places, so our tree went up some time on Black Friday. (Before it was called that; before that was the norm for the day)

When my girls came along, I kept up that tradition. One reason was that it was likely the only day off work that I could get it done. Another reason was Jeanie usually came and borrowed my children to help her get her tree up.

For many years, Rita hosted a family Christmas party -- usually on about that third Saturday in December. A  week  or so before that she'd have baking parties, where we all came and brought our children and decorated cookies. Job changes and working hours and distance made the baking parties more difficult, and as for the family party, the gift or dollar counters couldn't shut up and be happy. They had to tell everyone how much they'd spent and how they got something for this many people and only got this many or this much in return.
There's always someone, and the more total people, the more whiners. That's just a rule of life.
But it was really an ungrateful way to treat Rita. She wasn't responsible for what anyone else brought or bought. She just provided a place for the exchange to happen.
She eventually tired of it, and that tradition came to an end.

I don't know what traditions my girls will follow or for how long. I don't know how the traditions will change for me and Rex as our nest empties. It doesn't stay empty. Sometimes I think it never will. But when it does, it will create another change in traditions followed.

I'm looking forward to new traditions.

Can't tell yet what the girls will do.

Food for Thought (inspired by Steve)

Food has been on my mind a lot lately,  especially this last week of the month. It's been a long time since there was any income coming in. We have food, but not the variety and volume of food that comes in  with a regular paycheck. I'm pleased to have beans and I'm a whiz at creating things from  flour and water when I have to be. A liuttle salt, a little cinnamon.

Several years ago, Steve Newman appeared at a library event, for a book signing. I believe it was an anniversary for the library, though I can't remember which one. (It was within this decade, though, so I'm getting my timing better.) He spoke of his book and his travels and took questions afterward. There were two things that impressed me mightily at the time.

The first was something about flies. I don't remember exactly what he said, but it left me with the mental image of huge aggressive black flies trying to carry off food as it was going into a mouth. Not a pretty image.

The second was about the food. Especially in Africa and The Middle East, but really anywhere that there is poverty, people are not worrying about government established RDAs. (Not that the poor here care, but the darned things get a lot of news time.) They are not worrying about nutritional labeling. They are not worried about proper cooking temps. They are not worried about who to sue and blame it on when they get fat or burned.
They are worried about if they can find -- whether it's by beg, borrow, or steal -- enough plain bland rice to keep the stomach from cramping while they sleep, so that they can spend the next day in active pursuit of the next cup of rice.

Can you imagine?

Steve seemed to find the food issue the greatest source of culture shock. If you think about it, you can understand how that would be it. Three squares a day? No way. Work ten or twelve hours to be able to afford a bowl of rice? Or stand in line for a handout of a bowl of rice? Day after day after day after day?

Could you do it, do you think? What if it were the only way you could eat? If you had to do it?

There's a big bowl of rice in my refigerator. I don't like it, I don't want it. But it's there, and while it is there, we have food. So it stays until it's thankfully eaten, a reminder of what we do have instead of what we don't.

Letters from Steve

I just finished reading the book Letters From Steven: Stories from the first solo walk around the World. I found it to be good reading.

Mind you, the events written about happened in the mid 1980s, and the book was published in 1987, so I'm only a quarter of a century behind-times, but that's another story.

Steve Newman was a neighbor of ours, growing up. Well, he was mostly what we considered grown up, no matter how old (young) we were. He was older than even me, and I was the oldest junior person I knew. My sisters were friends (or friendly) with his sisters; some of my brothers with some of his brothers. I knew vaguely that he had aspirations of being a writer.

He fully fulfilled that dream of his, just as he did his WorldWalk.

I found the book to be amazing. The letters themselves (written to readers of Capper's Weekly) are well written and the tone is friendly and casual. The education in the letters is unsurpassed in any textbook. The descriptions -- well, let me tell you. I have looked back through the book for a couple of photographs to show my family. Only problem -- there were no photographs. The pictures were painted with words.

I am so envious.

Black Friday

Watching the craziness on the news last night reminded me, as it often does, of the early days of the event. Back when only a few stores had early bird sales -- my mom and my sister and I hurtling through the dark night down miles of highway and into unknown areas of the relatively unknown city. One favorite was the Gold Circle store. (Do they still have those anywhere?) I don't remember which location we went to. Somewhere in Cincinnati. And it seems, not unreasonably, that the store was up on a hill. I could be wrong about that. It was cold, it was dark, it was fun. The secrets of Christmas seemed to ooze through the air, out of all that hurrying darkness.

Another tradition, swallowed up by the malls and the push to grab the sales, was the Day after Thanksgiving at McAlpins. We went to the one at Cherry Grove Plaza. (It was called a shopping center then; nowadays it would be a strip mall. The only thing new is the words.) There were early bird sales there, too, but they were later -- at least for us! We would have had to go home and get the rest of the family. The big deal at McAlpins that day was the parade and FREE Santa Claus pictures. Not free until noon, not free for the first two hundred customers -- FREE. All day long.

I'm not sure when the McAlpins thing started, but it continued until my own children were old enough to be taken for the free pictures. By then we were into the 90s and malls were taking over the shopping world. They weren't a new idea -- Beechmont Mall had already been around for ages, or so it seemed. But it was an idea that was taking over, and the shopping centers (strip malls of the day) were hurting. McAlpins decided to move into the newly built Eastgate Mall as one of the anchor stores. Eastgate Mall was on different roads and in a different part of the county, and a long way to go for many of the Cherry Grove people.
The first Christmas there, they did have the parade and the free pictures. One of my cherished memories is that of Santa Claus saying to my girls, "I'm glad to see you. You're here every year."
But that was to be the last year. The parade was too difficult for traffic flow, and my god, they couldn't give away free pictures! The mall's Santa would lose business, god forbid!

Now, Santa comes out of hiding before the Halloween costumes are marked down and hidden away. The malls are suffering and closing and losing their anchor stores -- the cost is too high. The sales are too low.
Shopping Centers have returned in their new guise with their new name, and they seem to be thriving. Or at least surviving.

I can't help but wonder if there isn't a connection between the sales troubles and the Santa Clauses. No mall Santa that I know of ever recognized the families that come year after year. Can it be that in troubled times, people would rather shop where they are seen as people instead of so many dollars worth of sales?

Thanksgiving Day

It's been a gray and rainy day -- unusual in November, unusual in its intensity. Rain, yes. And Gray days are the rule for late November. But all-day all-night rain like this is -- boring. I don't care for it.

Other than that, it has been a quiet and peaceful day around here. Neither of our girls  graced us with their presence -- Tam had to work and whoknowswhat with Tracy. Rex's daughter called. But when she asked what time was dinner and when were we having it, and Rex replied none and never, she said: Well, I'm going to someone else's house than, so I can eat.

Rex and I have, so far, enjoyed a nice huge baked potato for our dinner. And I'm not complaining. We are truly thankful to have had that much. And, even though I was the cook, I have to say -- very yummy indeed. That oven did exactly what I wanted it to! So I'm thankful for the oven, too. There have been times when I haven't had that amenity.

A roof over our heads to keep the rain out, fire in the furnace to keep the damp out, food to cook, and something to cook it in. Yeah, we've got a lot more than you'd think.