New Year; Same OLD Me

There's really not much difference between December 31 and January 1, but just the changing of the calendar gives off a feeling of freshness. Of new starts, new chances, and Things Changing. 

It's a bit of silly, feeling that way, but most of us feel it anyway.

I think it has more to do with the returning daylight than anything else. 10 days or so, from the longest night and perhaps darkest day, the difference is already discernible. 

It is the return of hope. The promise of new life.

Usually, the coldest weather is yet to come. The snows, the ice, the blustering, freezing winds. 

But despite those disheartening events, there is daylight. A little more each day, and by the time a week or 10 days has elapsed, we can and will marvel how much longer the light is lingering.

This year past has brought almost every person some form of disease or disaster. The loss of someone or something; and the loss of individual freedoms for the greater good. (More shibboleths, I know, but the best way to repeat concepts as old as humankind.)

Let us try to remember this: That we have all lost something, even if it's "only" the world as we knew it. 

Scientists and politicians, so recently at odds, all forgot to reckon with the forces of Nature, or maybe the Wrath of God, if your beliefs lead you that way. When too much of any species occupies and consumes, in various ways, an area, then there comes a dying-off. You can blame the "smaller globe" syndrome. You can blame the Chineses people, who were just as disastrously dying as anyone else. You can blame spaceships, UFOs, aliens, angels, disturbed spirits, diseased factories, diseased morals. 

When there is so much disease, there will be a dying-off. 

This is one of the immutable rules of physical existence.

It is one of the rules of science.

It is also one of the rules of religions. That the diseased will be destroyed in great numbers whether in judgement and condemnation, or inertia.

Whatever the cause, it IS how things are. We start this New Year with the hope of brighter days coming and new life growing. We do not want to forget the loves we've lost or the lessons learned.

Let us fix what we can, instead of arguing over who to blame or how to avoid the inevitable.

Let us grow into better brighter tomorrows, worthy of those we cherish, whether they survive the struggle or not. We can bring something of them into the Fresh Tomorrow.

Let "us" be "us."

There is no them.

Only us.

Old is New

Being old is a new thing. At least, being this old at this young an age. There are plenty of people living the dream of 60 being the new 40.
Lucky them.

Me, at not quite 62. I feel more like 82. Some days maybe even 102. I envy those 'young' people. I always thought I'd be one of them.

I thought walking would keep me young(er) forever.

And then it kept getting more and more difficult.

Now, as well, as not walking, I'm grossly overweight.
I hurt. My back spasms. My hips are randomly stiff. My butt muscles tighten and ache. My knees buckle. My ankles roll. My feet swell.

I feel cold.

I'm beginning to have trouble hearing as well as visual problems. Even though my basic vision, thanks to last year's cataract surgeries, is better than it has been for years.

The cold is as much a surprise as the not walking. Cold hasn't especially bothered me much in my life. Put on more clothes, wear socks; that takes care of that.
Except that it no longer does.
The cold is inside me, working its way out.
In my bones.
A part of my bones, liquid and silvery.
And shivery.

Some days I feel frail, fragile, and feeble. It's an odd feeling in a body the size of a cow. Anyone this large should feel somewhat strong, even if it's "only" the strength of a steamroller.

I hate it.
I hate this.
I don't want to be prematurely old.
I also don't want to be an old person acting stupid-young. Although who really gets to define that? After a certain age and a certain amount of living, we should all be able to be ourselves: silly, shivering, happy, sad, glad, mad -- our best or truest self isn't anyone else's business.

It's a New Year, but it isn't a New Me.
It's an Old me.
And getting older.

New Year; New Day

As everyone sinks into the revelry of the new year, let's remember that every day is a new day. Resolutions needn't be for the New Year only.
Every new day is a chance to start over, to learn from mistakes, to be not quite as stupid as we were yesterday.
We can learn, we can change, and we don't need any special reason to do these things.
We can wake each morning with the resolve to be a better person. To only speak kindly or not at all. To not have an extra dessert today. To hug our loved ones just because we can.

If we're lucky, we'll get to do it all again tomorrow. If we're not, we'll be leaving pleasant memories behind.

Today, this new day, I resolve to...