Dream it; Do it; Or Quitcher Whining.

My husband is watching yet another reality show about gold mining or fishing or deep sea ice diving (or ice driving) or whatever excuse this bunch of "men" are using as an excuse to not have to live a real life, like the rest of us have to do.

I don't know why he watches these shows. I don't know why anyone watches many of these shows. I think there's supposed to be a "Man against Nature" challenge, and we're all dreaming of ourselves as winning against the impersonal, implacable elements.

But what you hear during these programs is a lot of whining. "Oh we need 35 per yard and we're only getting six. It's all the machine's fault." "Oh no, if we don't find something, I'm going to go to jail for child support. The boss better find us a better place to work; it's his fault this isn't working." And the self sacrificing Valiant "I do this for my kids. So they'll have something. That's why I'm 2000 miles away and unavailable by telephone."

1) Take care of the machine, and don't over work it. It's a machine, dumbass.
2) If you're worried about paying support, get a real job with a regular paycheck in a regular amount.
3) Maybe, just maybe what your kids really need is a father. Ever thought they might like to see you every now and then? They might like to call you in an emergency and have you there in a half hour or two? They might even appreciate a hug or a handshake, depending on age or gender!

One of the gentlemen earlier today was talking on and on about his "Big Dream" of making "THE Big Strike." Then he'll never have to worry again.

We all have Big Dreams. Almost all of us dream of winning the lottery, especially when that old Power Ball gets way up there. We don't abandon our families to chase that dream. We don't spend money they could use for food or heat while we travel to another state to be closer to the winning-ticket-vending places, do we? And blame the machine for not printing us the winning numbers? Or the clerk for not selling us the right numbers? Because we are trying so hard to realize our dream, the failure couldn't be our fault, could it?

(Of course, that could be why we don't get made into TV shows.)

Another Big Dream of mine is to be a published, income-earning writer. If I never become that, though, it's no one's fault but mine. Yeah, there are publishers turning their backs on a good thing, and editors who don't know what they're missing -- but I'm the one who didn't write right enough to attract them. I'm the one who used the wrong approach or followed the wrong path to their doors.

I'm the one who is dreaming big and doing little.

But at least I'm not on national cable television crying and whining and telling the world that I am a big LOSER because someONE or someTHING  is stopping me. (I admit to whining about it amongst my colleagues and kinfolk, but that is a little different.)

There's nothing wrong with dreaming of a gold mine, but you take care of your family first. You handle your responsibilities first.

You get a day job, for those you love, and you pursue your dream on your own personal private time.

Or you make yourself famous for being a loser at life.

The choice is yours.

What's a Season? TV

What is a season on tv these days? It used to be 26 weeks, with a holiday break and a summer of reruns. Then they went to "summer replacement" shows. Then one of the new networks -- Fox or UPN or WB -- invented first run summer series with, I think, one of the teen soaps.

Since then the definition of a season has become looser to the point that it is no longer a definition.

I blame reality TV. Cable channels have flooded the market with what I call snippet shows. Operation Repo, Deputy Butterbean, Bad Girls Club. They are about something and have engaging characters (sometimes) but there are no storylines and no plots or plot development. The producers film and snip together a whole bunch of bits of this and pieces of that to fit the tome format, then release all the edited material to whatever network is airing them.

The network then begins their hype. "New Season" "Season Premiere" "New (title)"
They will show two or three or four  episodes at a time, and so three months of programming may be used up within four weeks.

Then the new season is all of a month old before it is over and back to reruns.

That's a month, not a season.

Sadly, the over-the-airwaves networks have picked up on this trend. We are currently getting a half and half mixture of old and new shows on our regular series. The networks don't seem to have recovered from the holiday break this year. I never know (until I read the Guide) whether the show I am following will be new programming, or something old and tired that has probably been on twice since Christmas.
Not an impressive build-up to season finale/cliffhangers.

Now, I don't mind that they do this. It's their programming, and their business which they can run however they want. That is their business.

But they shouldn't advertise the "all new season" as starting, show two new programs and three weeks of reruns, then two new and three old again. Even three new and one old doesn't merit being touted as an "all new season" because, you see. it isn't ALL new.

I'll just watch the shows on cable, where I already know they are ALL reruns, and no one is lying about seasons.

While I'm griping: What happened to scIFi?

While I'm griping, I'll move on to my other big gripe this week, or month, or season.

What in the world has happened to Syfy (once Scifi) channel? They once had some of the most interesting programming anywhere. They did a lot of their own movies (Earthsea). They picked up discontinued network shows (Firefly/Serenity) Their regular programming was a mix of reality programming (Destination Truth, Fact or Faked) and odd fiction (Eureka, Haven).

Since before Thanksgiving, they've been a faint echo of Chiller network, rehashing and rerunning, over and over again, horror movies. Did someone in their office forget to change the calendar from October?

Some of it has been fine -- nothing wrong with horror on "Friday the Thirteenth", for example. But most of it -- there's nothing original in the movies they've been constantly replaying. How many times can we watch the three versions/chapters of the Halloween series? How many times is anyone going to sit through Troy? And disasters are fine for 2012 The End of The World. Creatures are coming out of all the cracks this old world is showing as it falls apart and blows away, but can't someone please -- pleasepleaseplease -- get rid of that damned Dinocroc for once and for all?

The only original syfy programming has been Ghost Hunters and Face-Off. Ghost Hunters I watch, Face-Off I don't. Doesn't appeal to me, but it belongs in the line-up.

That is, it did, back in the day when they actually had a line-up.

The network teased us a bit back at Christmas, advertising widely that Haven, Eureka, and Warehouse 13 were all coming back brand new,

They did.

For ONE Christmas themed episode each, that was rebroadcast extensively until the aforementioned Friday the Thirteenth.

I feel cheated. I feel that Syfy has turned its back on the fans that made the network such a great place to watch original programming. Maybe they ran out of ideas. Maybe they've made enough money and just don't care anymore. Maybe they fired all the writers and no one has told them how many unemployed writers there are out there. Maybe the adventurers and skeptics all went home for very long holidays

Because I don't care any more. I'll watch my horror movies on the horror movie channel, and instead of watching TV I'll read a book.
 Or write one.

 Original ideas are out there. Someone just has to look.
It could be an adventure.

Cooking and Looking

Cooking shows used to be about cooking. About recipes, and following the directions. Cooking shows were the original reality TV. The smooth blends, the careful combining of dry and wet ingredients, every step demonstrated and shown, step-by-step. Oven temps and burner settings and the right type of pan. They told how to do it all, what it should look like, how it should smell.
Now, there are many, many, MANY variations of cooking shows. They have little connection to the follow-the-recipe shows of old.
Actually, they are not cooking shows. They are eating shows.
You can watch 'chefs' eat their way around a city, the important thing being who can most quickly eat the most. Any cooking or flavor components are there as clues to the next food you have to quickly ingest in spite of flavor, texture, or taste.
You can watch a fat man (how did he get that way?) wander all over the country eating the world's largest hamburger or the great steak of blank. Yeah, just watch that man eat!

Of course, the shows do go into the kitchens. They show you a powdery spice mix and tell you here's the secret ingredients -- not that you know any more about what the ingredients are. They show you how it's put on and how the food is cooked and the way to build the sandwich, if there is a sandwich.

Then there are the 'kitchen' shows. Contestants line up at prep tables and they are all supposed to make something, sometimes the same things, out of identical ingredients.  They show all the cooks doing the same or different things. One contestant uses a skillet, one boils, one broils, another bakes. Sometimes the cook will tell the camera, 'I think broiling will preserve the flavor without destroying the integrity of the selection.'  Huh?
I know I want to try that for supper tonight.

Then they have to be judged. The judges must consider whether the grape leaf should be tilted more to the right or the left, and if the sauce dribbled across the plate is writing in secret code or not. (Points off if they can read it.) Finally, they must decide if the food is edible enough for the prize. It doesn't matter if the idea of the food is appetizing -- that's completely nonessential.
I, for one, do not think fish flavored ice cream is ever edible, no matter how much cream and sugar is mixed in. Because that's a favorite 'strategy'. If you don't know what else to do with it, make it ice cream. YUM!

Why do people watch this? What is the fascination?
Food needs to be tasted. It needs to be smelled. It needs to be felt. One can't know the texture of a blend from looking at it on the screen. One can't inhale the aroma of good things coming together in a skillet or an oven. Most of all, one can't taste the result.

So why watch? If you want to see fat people eat, go to the fair. If you want to watch a circus, go to the circus. If you want to enjoy food, fix it for yourself. That's what appeases the appetite.