Bad Medicine

How do you find out if a minor health problem is a possible health crisis? Where do you look up information on how to tell the difference? When and how do you reach the decision that it's time to stop waiting for people to get back to you and to take action on your own?

My husband has a nosebleed. Now, this is not a big deal -- one can hardly term it a health crisis when the blood is not pouring down his face, his shirt front, his lap. It's not that kind of nosebleed.

I've called his doctor's office. Yesterday they said someone would call me. Today they said someone would call me. The recording that answers their phone say "if this is an emergency, call 911" Please help me, people, I am trying to find out if it is an emergency. Just tell me that, okay?

 Someone advised me to keep calling the office -- she suggested every half hour. It takes twenty minutes to just get past the computerized answer center, and then you have to tell the answerer all the information they have already supposedly sorted you into the category where they should know.
And then they tell you that if this is an emergency, you should call 911 or go to the ER.

I just want to know, need to know, if the problem is serious enough to justify an ER visit, because this is not something that should be done lightly. EVER. By anyone.

Other people have these problems. Mothers with young children, for example. When does a fever, vomiting, headache warrant that trip? How can we know, how can we find out?

There are call centers for some insurance companies. Bethesda Hospitals used to have ask-a-nurse programs.
I used those once or twice. Do you know what they tell you? "Maybe you should go to the ER just in case." And then the insurance company will refuse to pay the bill, or their fair share of the bill, because no one was in actual danger of dying.
The excuse is that no one is qualified to give medical advice by phone. They won't/can't risk the liability.

Why have the program then? What good is it?

This whole situation is an example of the problems in our health care systems. We can't get advice. Doctors don't call. Insurance companies don't pay, even when the insured does what they were told. No one wants to waste anyone's time, working on a patient that doesn't need to be seen, just counselled. But no one wants to offer just counselling.

I just want some advice. Knowledgeable advice. It's up to me to act (or not) on that advice, but I'd still like to have it.

Isn't medicine supposed to be about making informed decisions?

Where's the information?